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mike_1stgear
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Posted: 29 August 2013 at 5:30pm | IP Logged Quote mike_1stgear


er no

but Kevyn got it

i still like this joke


The police came to my front door last night holding a picture of my wife. They said "is this your wife sir?".
Shocked I answered " yes".
They said "I'm afraid it looks like she's been hit by a bus".
I said "I know but she has a lovely personality".
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Kevyn
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Posted: 02 September 2013 at 1:57pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn

 

"A wife is a great help to a man, with all the problems that he never had as a bachelor"        Archbishop Edward White Benson

 

 



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Kevyn
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Posted: 23 September 2013 at 10:19pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn





Essex Girls
Five blokes in an Audi Quattro arrived at the ferry checkpoint in Harwich, Essex.

Tracey, in her brand new uniform, stops them and tells them: "I can't let you on the ferry. It is illegal to have 5 people in a Quattro. Quattro means four. One of you will have to get out and stay behind."
"Quattro is just the name of the car," the driver replies disbelievingly. "Look at the papers: this car is designed to carry five persons."

"You cannot pull that one on me. This is Tracey you're talking to here," she replies with a smile. "Quattro means four. You have five people in your car and you are therefore breaking the law. So I can't let you onto the ferry. It's more than my job's worth to let you all on."

The driver is now very cross and replies angrily, "I've had enough of you. Call your supervisor over. I want to speak to someone with more intelligence!"

"Sorry," responds Tracey, "but Sharon is busy with those two blokes in the Fiat Uno."

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Kevyn
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Posted: 15 January 2014 at 1:14pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn

 

A maths student partied hard on a Sunday night, before realising that he had an important asignment to hand in on the Monday morning - he had no alternative but to stay up all night and finish it.

At the next tutorial, the student found out that he got a very low mark.  The tutor was very disappointed and said, "How many times must I tell you?  Don't drink and derive!" 



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Kevyn
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Posted: 15 January 2014 at 1:16pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn

 

I met a heretic the other day who believes that salvation is 87.5% God's work and 12.5% man's effort.

He is a hemi-demi-semi-pelagian.

 



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Kevyn
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Posted: 15 January 2014 at 1:17pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn

 

Nearly reached 200.

 

 



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Kevyn
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Posted: 15 January 2014 at 1:19pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn

 

Yay, I've made it!

Nunc dimittis Forum.

 



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Kevyn
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Posted: 15 January 2014 at 1:22pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn

 

Oh, I am still a roadie



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OnLineGenie
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Posted: 15 January 2014 at 2:11pm | IP Logged Quote OnLineGenie

Better than being a groupie!

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Kevyn
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Posted: 16 January 2014 at 1:18pm | IP Logged Quote Kevyn

 

The art of gargling has been practised for thousands of years.

Iron age tribes used to pass it down from generation to generation as part of their oral tradition.

 

 



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